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your weeks in the best-seller list

sure enough there you were
your outfit was one of those covers
          colored in guilty pleasures
the cap was the perfect blurb
          and your hair
so subtle a title, suggestive, so that
          pages whispered your smell

i was swept up with everybody else
          grabbed you, held you, took you
everywhere, nowhere without you
          ran my fingers through your lines
committed all to memory, fought sleep
          to finish your story and go over
my favorite passages, highlighting
          choosing your words

then i realized i had only seen
          your manuscript, dog eared
marked with the pencils of years
          bursting with the promise
and there you were, open to my last page
          but the ending was missing
your legs wrote past me as you left

i only read what i could in the time
i was able to see you browsing
i tried to find a copy in the basement
i was a fool to think of you as a bargain

it never really occurred to me i was the only
one could see you for the story you really were



so many more miles to go

i caught the first whiff of your signature scent
     somewhere outside cleveland after dusk
there was a certain twang to your essence
     not unlike a tense guitar string screaming
quietly with finger picking precision back
     in the lounge car with the other passengers

another window looks out into our ignorance
another one is always offering unsolicited words
another reason to steal your smile and make it my own

there are no more stops from here on out
     across from you is a little bit warmer
than having to listen to more of his drivel
     the thundercarrot turns out to be nothing
but the latest disappointment, just a weird name
     and i still cannot muster enough gall to address you

perhaps this is not where we are supposed to be
perhaps dinner is not the answer you wanted
perhaps we didn't hear what we thought we heard

this is what happens when you decide to prioritize
     and everything i want is contained inside
the supple vessel of your lap, your eyes, your exit
     a bit of fresh air does not help at all and the way
you scan the passage of so many mistakes
     is nothing like the raised eyebrow to my passing

so this is how that emptiness grows and grows
so this is the best i can do without my dreams
so this how my road unravels in your back country


my beta carotene...

The way of the Thundercarrot
Kant break the pain with nuttin else
Baby carrott in the Ass
Baby carrott happenin fast!
Hi my beta carotene
Oh I wish I was still a teen
Take my ass to the back
Gonna shoot some fuckin crack